Tell a joke!
+9
caoireann
CripKilla
Marnex
Thomandy
MLundegaard
Pianokid220
pianohama
goodell
Admin Andrew
13 posters
Andrew Furmanczyk Piano Academy :: Learn How To Play Piano :: Social Paradise! :: Talk about anything
Page 2 of 2
Page 2 of 2 • 1, 2
Will this joke Translate?
A fella lands himself in prison...On his first day inside, he's down in the mess hall having lunch. All of a sudden, one of the inmates stands up and shouts out "42". Everyone sitting around erupts laughing. Another guy stands up and shouts "118". Once again the crowd explodes with laughter. The prisoner turns to the guy beside him and asks what the deal is. The guy replies "We've all been here so long, we know all the jokes, so we've numbered them". So the new prisoner decides to try this out. He stands up and shouts "98". There's complete silence. He turns to the chap beside him and says "Is 98 not funny?" To which he replies "Nah, it's not that,It's the way you tell it"
One of my favourites;) Very Irish!
One of my favourites;) Very Irish!
caoireann- Beginner pianist
- Number of posts : 17
Location : Ireland
Length of time playing piano : one year
Guru Points : 2
Registration date : 2009-04-03
Re: Tell a joke!
It's all about how you tell it, or in these cases, read it
VictorCS- Moderator
- Number of posts : 944
Location : Norway
Length of time playing piano : Started playing seriously in 2007, and been doing so since.
Guru Points : 18
Registration date : 2008-03-09
Re: Tell a joke!
I found this joke to be quite funny
Money Talks!
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."
He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.
On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"
The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."
The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."
Money Talks!
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."
He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.
On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"
The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."
The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."
Re: Tell a joke!
and yet one more joke I just had to add this one.
Goodbye To Mother
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab -"Sorry I took so long" he says, "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"
Goodbye To Mother
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab -"Sorry I took so long" he says, "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"
Re: Tell a joke!
Admin Andrew wrote:and yet one more joke I just had to add this one.
Goodbye To Mother
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab -"Sorry I took so long" he says, "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"
Hehe, good one
Re: Tell a joke!
Admin Andrew wrote:and yet one more joke I just had to add this one.
Goodbye To Mother
A couple were going out for the evening. They'd got ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc.
The taxi arrives, and as the couple got out, the cat shoots back in. They don't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab -"Sorry I took so long" he says, "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"
This made my day!
Marnex- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 210
Age : 30
Location : Atlanta,Georgia
Job/hobbies : Video games,computer, and piano
Length of time playing piano : Since 2008
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-05-30
Re: Tell a joke!
A fella walks into a barbers and says " Can you shave a bald spot on the back of my head, cut a zig zag into my fringe and shave one of my sideburns off" to which barber replies "I'm not sure I can do that sir". The man responds " Should be no problem to you, that's what you did to me a few weeks back"
Last edited by caoireann on Mon Apr 06, 2009 1:26 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : typo)
caoireann- Beginner pianist
- Number of posts : 17
Location : Ireland
Length of time playing piano : one year
Guru Points : 2
Registration date : 2009-04-03
Re: Tell a joke!
Computer games don’t affect kids; I mean if Pac-Man affected us as kids, we’d all be running around in darkened rooms, munching magic pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.
— Nintendo, 1989 —
— Nintendo, 1989 —
CripKilla- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 423
Location : Hyrule Field
Job/hobbies : Bank Robber
Length of time playing piano : Since Huamn Existence
Guru Points : 12
Registration date : 2008-04-21
Re: Tell a joke!
^ Haha that was pretty funny.
Marnex- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 210
Age : 30
Location : Atlanta,Georgia
Job/hobbies : Video games,computer, and piano
Length of time playing piano : Since 2008
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-05-30
Re: Tell a joke!
What did the five fingers say to the face?
SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(usually accompanied by slapping the guy you just told it to in the face)
SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(usually accompanied by slapping the guy you just told it to in the face)
pianohama- Recognized Teacher
- Number of posts : 462
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-03-10
Re: Tell a joke!
pianohama wrote:What did the five fingers say to the face?
SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(usually accompanied by slapping the guy you just told it to in the face)
I saw that episode 2 days ago, couldn't stop laughing
goodell- Advanced Pianist
- Number of posts : 50
Age : 35
Location : Texas
Job/hobbies : No job currently / Soccer, weight lifting, tennis, video games, gaining useless talents....
Length of time playing piano : Since about Feb. 10, 2009
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2009-02-18
Re: Tell a joke!
LOL!!!!!!!!! Man, I want to try that now, but I can't think of any friends I want to ruin my friendship with...hmmm
Re: Tell a joke!
goodell wrote:pianohama wrote:What did the five fingers say to the face?
SLAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(usually accompanied by slapping the guy you just told it to in the face)
I saw that episode 2 days ago, couldn't stop laughing
lol dave chapelle is the king
pianohama- Recognized Teacher
- Number of posts : 462
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-03-10
Re: Tell a joke!
Lol yeah!
Marnex- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 210
Age : 30
Location : Atlanta,Georgia
Job/hobbies : Video games,computer, and piano
Length of time playing piano : Since 2008
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-05-30
Re: Tell a joke!
Admin Andrew wrote: funny, but try to keep it clean incase there's kid on here XD
I guess the word Sh*t is looked at differently here in Canada as well as Usa?
Cause in Norway we got/had a candybag that had the (translated) name: SHI*TCANDY consisting of some nice candy things.. Directed to children We are perhaps more liberal here
Re: Tell a joke!
A dog, a priest and Dracula walk into a bar, and the Nun says-
Oh wait, I cant say that one!
Oh wait, I cant say that one!
Biko- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 177
Age : 29
Length of time playing piano : Just over a year, still cant play.
Guru Points : 0
Registration date : 2008-05-12
Re: Tell a joke!
I was wondering .. !
two tons of metal and two tons of feather..
which one is the the heaviest ??
two tons of metal and two tons of feather..
which one is the the heaviest ??
MysteriousGgirl- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 125
Age : 32
Job/hobbies : Designing, Drawing and playing Piano
Length of time playing piano : Biggner needs alot of help :D
Guru Points : 1
Registration date : 2009-05-02
Re: Tell a joke!
MysteriousGgirl wrote:I was wondering .. !
two tons of metal and two tons of feather..
which one is the the heaviest ??
well, i know the joke is that their both two tons and its exactly the same,
but in my fysics class we've talked about this and actually two tons of metal would be heavier because of its density, plus because of the air trapped between the feathers it would make it ligher. So my answer is this: They weigh the same, but metal is heavier, this can easily be demonstrated by dropping both into water, the metal would drop to the ground be the feathers would float.
pianohama- Recognized Teacher
- Number of posts : 462
Guru Points : 3
Registration date : 2008-03-10
Re: Tell a joke!
as i know its the same i dont know the details
but its a logic answer..
but its a logic answer..
MysteriousGgirl- Well-known Pianist
- Number of posts : 125
Age : 32
Job/hobbies : Designing, Drawing and playing Piano
Length of time playing piano : Biggner needs alot of help :D
Guru Points : 1
Registration date : 2009-05-02
Page 2 of 2 • 1, 2
Andrew Furmanczyk Piano Academy :: Learn How To Play Piano :: Social Paradise! :: Talk about anything
Page 2 of 2
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
Sat Oct 26, 2013 3:15 am by RNewcome
» What's Happened...?
Sun Mar 24, 2013 10:57 pm by Rayman
» Thomas's Performances - NEW Liszt Moments Musicaux D.01 - Page 39
Thu Jun 21, 2012 4:16 pm by Thomandy
» latin rhythms on piano
Wed Jun 06, 2012 7:49 am by jazzylady
» What is the deal with time signatures with a bottom number of 16?
Wed May 23, 2012 8:13 am by Matthieu Stepec
» Piano Dog's Lick of The Week
Sun May 20, 2012 2:17 pm by kentaku_sama
» How to span notes
Wed May 09, 2012 9:55 pm by Matthieu Stepec
» Great sight reading exercises
Tue May 08, 2012 6:11 am by Matthieu Stepec
» Hey guys! How's it going?
Sun Jan 29, 2012 10:43 am by surehit123