The Bragging Discussion

Lanxil wrote:I wouldn`t consider it as bragging. more as a way of advertising. ^^
I mean you kinda changed the life of some people over the Internet
(let`s say to something better xD), so why shouldn`t you make such an
, like I defined it, advert. I mean it is easy for a person that knows how to gather information about a certain topic in the to find your videos (as it was in my case) but other people don`t have this kind of ability(or are way tooooo lazy xD).
Meaning: Go for it ^^

The reason you dont see it as bragging is I guess your negative association to that word!!
But when you want to share something you are proud of to many people it Is in my opinion bragging!!
BUT that is not a bad thing If one brag about things cause one are proud of something or an achievement ect.. Bragging is only a bad thing if one say it to feel more important than others or to show of!^^
But if you are proud, brag a little! Its perfectly fine If its every single time something small but cool happens, then it starts to get distasteful! Im not sure, but we also might see this word very different! We all live in different cultures and got different ground structures in our thinking In Norway we got something called "Janteloven"(Law of Jante) and its sort a bad culture thing: Its basically revolved around "You shouldnt think are are something, better than others, brag ect" its of course not a Law, its more a fun thing that sort of lies in the nature of many, all over the world I guess, so thats why we might se Bragging in general to be a bad thing I dont know, hehe, just ramblin'

Thomandy wrote:
Im not sure, but we also might see this word very different! We all live in different cultures and got different ground structures in our thinking In Norway we got something called "Janteloven"(Law of Jante) and its sort a bad culture thing: Its basically revolved around "You shouldnt think you are something, better than others, brag ect" its of course not a Law, its more a fun thing that sort of lies in the nature of many, all over the world I guess, so thats why we might se Bragging in general to be a bad thing

Seems to me like you solved to whole problem through philosophy, I appreciate that!
But the problem lies in human nature.Many of those, who brag are likely to be people who overdo it.
Of course It is a question of morality. A person with morals wouldn`t overdo it, but, because there are those people, who overdo it, we, or at least I, have an negative association with it.
Sure there are different cultures with different ways of behavour, but I think you can not deny the fact, that psychology, meaning certain ways of behaving, is something that does not change, wherever you are.
(of course this applies only to humans xD)
I mean most people would do everything (for example) for money, if the amount is high enough.
I know, that we could quarrel about that all night long, because it would lead us to many different questions in life... but well, let`s leave it at that if you are agreed ^^
(yeah I kinda like philosophy xD and I like discussions [if that is the right word for it ^^])

Admin Andrew wrote:Hey guys! I was in a national magazine! (you might have read that in another post) I wanted to ask you guys if I should make a video telling people about it on my youtube channel. Or do you think it's bragging?? here's what it looks like

Andrew,

I think there are always going to be people who envy you because you are becoming successful. (then they start trying to guilt trip you, by bringing up morality issues, or telling you you're a bad person if you "brag")

If you decide to promote yourself, there WILL be people who don't want changes, who enjoy security in small numbers (for some odd reason) and who would rather see you in a mediocre lifestyle. If I were ever to get my picture in a NATIONAL magazine, for doing something like TEACHING PIANO TO THE LESS FORTUNATE, (not only that, but also watch over a community, keeping it safe, clean, and friendly) I would totally "brag" about it to everyone I knew. You're doing something good for the world. Why keep it to only a select few?

One thing is, its not bragging, because bragging would imply that you're being arrogant. You are a very humble person, you're very dedicated, and you're very talented. I think if anyone else on this forum were in your position, they would not hesitate to "show off".

To all you people NOT giving Andrew the encouragement and telling him to "limit" his "bragging"... WHY??

If it weren't for his hard work you would probably not be here. How have YOU paid him back? By telling him subtly to hold back? That's not very nice of you.


My final thought: we can not decide what you do with yourself, this community, and your YouTube channel. We can only give you suggestions.. You have a lot of attention on you and its increasing day by day, so I would start focusing on the future, and maybe make a map of what I would want to do with all of your work. Put it together on a site? Maybe start thinking about changes? Such as maybe adding new content, or getting special advertisers (its not selling out, we all have to eat), maybe you could even have a special VIP section in the forums in order to promote forum growth and bring it to life. Its a big community, but its not alive... you should change that.

You've done a lot for the people that have thanked you, and there's a ton of people who didn't thank you, and you've stilled managed to help. Maybe its time to indulge a little and help y o u r s e l f.

-W


P.S. CONGRATS ASDJFHALKJSDHFAKJHDFKAHSDFKAS!!!!!!!
That's IS ..... AWESOME. A magazine?!!?!?!?!?

theWarden wrote:

One thing is, its not bragging, because bragging would imply that you're being arrogant. You are a very humble person, you're very dedicated, and you're very talented. I think if anyone else on this forum were in your position, they would not hesitate to "show off".

Associations and meanings to words like Bragging ect are based very much on cultural and personal understanding of the word. I have no idea what influences you got ect but in my opinion as I stated several times above is that Bragging can be divided into 2 groups based on why the person brags.

1: That you want to share and tell something you are proud of
2: That you want to show people you are better than them(arrogant like you call it)

In Norway we use the same word in another meaning aswell.
Directly translated like this:

People can Brag about something! or
People can Give other people Brag**

** In English = to give them honor for something they have done well!!

So again, everything must be seen in a cultural and individually cultural differences!!!^^ So even though you see a person bragging as a Arrogant person, others might not!

Hmm.. I'm confused, friend.
I think you may be contradicting yourself.

Thomandy wrote:

Associations and meanings to words like Bragging ect are based very much on cultural and personal understanding of the word. I have no idea what influences you got ect but in my opinion as I stated several times above is that Bragging can be divided into 2 groups based on why the person brags.

1: That you want to share and tell something you are proud of
2: That you want to show people you are better than them(arrogant like you call it)

I don't see how our definitions of the word "bragging" differ.

I think we can all agree that Andrew is not doing this for money, or fame, or girls (*snicker* ) but because he loves music and teaching, and is a devout pianist. He's never once stated that he's better than anyone, and if he were arrogant, he wouldn't be sharing his secrets with us.

He didn't just make one video, or two, or five. He made roughly about 80+ half hour videos. He recorded them once, then a second time with a better camera, a more structured teaching system, and no braces. HEHE. I THINK that deserves a BIT of recognition. More than just some YouTube views, more than just some forum friends. The magazine recognized his talent and his ability and willingness to help others.

Thomandy wrote:

So again, everything must be seen in a cultural and individually cultural differences!!!^^ So even though you see a person bragging as a Arrogant person, others might not!

Well we're going off the ROOT definition of the word, which appears to have the same meaning in your culture and mine. So by DEFINITION, he's not being arrogant, he's just being proud of HIS hard work.

So let's not label it bragging because by DEFINITION in BOTH of our cultures, (and others) bragging implies arrogance. And nobody likes a stuck up snob.



Let's call it "being proud". OR, as you would say in Norway, honoring him.



-W

theWarden wrote:Hmm.. I'm confused, friend.
I think you may be contradicting yourself.

Thomandy wrote:

Associations and meanings to words like Bragging ect are based very much on cultural and personal understanding of the word. I have no idea what influences you got ect but in my opinion as I stated several times above is that Bragging can be divided into 2 groups based on why the person brags.

1: That you want to share and tell something you are proud of
2: That you want to show people you are better than them(arrogant like you call it)

I don't see how our definitions of the word "bragging" differ.

Nope, Im not contradicting myself!!
Cant you see the difference? Seriously?
Then let me ask you;

1:If you tell someone something you are proud of are you arrogant because of that? - No, you are not arrogant then!

2:If you tell someone something cause you want to feel better than them, make your importance greater ect, are you then arrogant and demeaning? - Yes, you are!

So then, do you see the difference then? Its about what motivates you, what reasons you got to brag that makes it either a negative or positive!!

theWarden wrote:
I think we can all agree that Andrew is not doing this for money, or fame, or girls (*snicker* ) but because he loves music and teaching, and is a devout pianist. He's never once stated that he's better than anyone, and if he were arrogant, he wouldn't be sharing his secrets with us.

He didn't just make one video, or two, or five. He made roughly about 80+ half hour videos. He recorded them once, then a second time with a better camera, a more structured teaching system, and no braces. HEHE. I THINK that deserves a BIT of recognition. More than just some YouTube views, more than just some forum friends. The magazine recognized his talent and his ability and willingness to help others.

Yeah? I agree with you on that, I Never said that he didnt deserve to get in a magazine!
I didnt say it was a bad thing to brag about it either, only thing I want to get out is how cultures and personal experience, parental influences ect ect ect affect How we Interpretat Words!! In this case: "To Brag".

Thomandy wrote:
So again, everything must be seen in a cultural and individually cultural differences!!!^^ So even though you see a person bragging as a Arrogant person, others might not!

theWarden wrote:
Well we're going off the ROOT definition of the word, which appears to have the same meaning in your culture and mine. So by DEFINITION, he's not being arrogant, he's just being proud of HIS hard work.

So let's not label it bragging because by DEFINITION in BOTH of our cultures, (and others) bragging implies arrogance. And nobody likes a stuck up snob.



Let's call it "being proud". OR, as you would say in Norway, honoring him.
-W

Dosnt seam like you understand me at all I Never said he was arrogant! In my culture and understanding of this word is as I have said several times now, divided into 2 groups, the underlying reasons for bragging! That was my only point! I have spent more or less 1 year studying this subject, and I would like you to tell me how you know that "Bragging" is = Arrogance, Snob ect in all cultures and personal opinions ect - Im not even talking about the words definition, cause its a Great difference in a words defined meaning and what cultural aspects lie in it. I can promise you, that if you only use your own culture to define the world you are nearly blind!

What im presenting isnt even a discussion, its the way things Are!! I can understand why you see Bragging as a negative and = arrogance, its because of how you have been presented to the word in your up growing! But I cant see why you dont manage to see that I got a different view on the word, and why you are so against giving the word a different meaning based on who is the one seeing the word?

theWarden wrote:
Well we're going off the ROOT definition of the word, which appears to have the same meaning in your culture and mine. So by DEFINITION, he's not being arrogant, he's just being proud of HIS hard work.

Yeah, and that makes his bragging a positive thing!
Of course seen through my personal culturally influenced reality! But that shouldnt have to be said
Because every single social situation that ever have happened and will happen will be looked at differently depending on who is seeing and interpretate what is happening!!

Okay. Last one about this topic for me:

I'm not saying you're calling him arrogant, or anything of the sort. What I'm saying is that you're purposely using a word that is MISLEADING. As you said, we are all from different backgrounds and as such you should BE CONSIDERATE of others' feelings because he's from CANADA, and as such, he doesn't have YOUR cultural knowledge. (you studied this for a year, mate. he didn't.) SO to HIM it the word "bragging" ALSO would imply that he's being arrogant. That's why in his post he even said

Admin Andrew wrote:I wanted to ask you guys if I should make a video telling people about it on my youtube channel. Or do you think it's bragging??

What do you think he meant by "bragging"? I don't think he was using your meaning of it.

His saying of "DO YOU THINK ITS BRAGGING" - he doesn't want to feel like others are not equal to him

But you're saying to him "OH YES IT IS IS BRAGGING" - you're using the word in your context, but replying it to him without explicitly saying so

Knowing WELL ENOUGH that he didn't study the word bragging for a year like you did, sir. So in his mind, you're telling him that he's being arrogant, while in your mind you're giving him a compliment. Does it make sense to you? I hope so, you DID study this for a year.

You said yourself

Thomandy wrote:
Yeah, and that makes his bragging a positive thing!
Of course seen through my personal culturally influenced reality! But that shouldnt have to be said
Because every single social situation that ever have happened and will happen will be looked at differently depending on who is seeing and interpretate what is happening!!

WE don't all live in your reality. And thus, you should choose your words more carefully.

'Nuff said.


- W

theWarden wrote:Okay. Last one about this topic for me:

I'm not saying you're calling him arrogant, or anything of the sort. What I'm saying is that you're purposely using a word that is MISLEADING. As you said, we are all from different backgrounds and as such you should BE CONSIDERATE of others' feelings because he's from CANADA, and as such, he doesn't have YOUR cultural knowledge. (you studied this for a year, mate. he didn't.) SO to HIM it the word "bragging" ALSO would imply that he's being arrogant. That's why in his post he even said

Admin Andrew wrote:I wanted to ask you guys if I should make a video telling people about it on my youtube channel. Or do you think it's bragging??

What do you think he meant by "bragging"? I don't think he was using your meaning of it.

His saying of "DO YOU THINK ITS BRAGGING" - he doesn't want to feel like others are not equal to him

But you're saying to him "OH YES IT IS IS BRAGGING" - you're using the word in your context, but replying it to him without explicitly saying so

I guess you never read my first comment?!

Now Thats why I explained it when I said I looked on it as bragging
So that he wouldnt misunderstand what I was putting into the word!^^
And then avoiding any chance of a misunderstanding!!!!!

Thomandy wrote:Awesome for sure

About the video! Do it as a V-log type video and its cool!! It IS bragging, but thats allowed when done with modesty Its when the bragging takes control over you, that its a bad thing!!

If you are proud of something, Tell it

If its telling just to tell, then dont!

But Im pretty sure you know what side of the line you are on before posting a video like that!!

Thomandy wrote:
I have spent more or less 1 year studying this subject, and I would like you to tell me how you know that "Bragging" is = Arrogance, Snob ect in all cultures and personal opinions ect - Im not even talking about the words definition, cause its a Great difference in a words defined meaning and what cultural aspects lie in it. I can promise you, that if you only use your own culture to define the world you are nearly blind!

Thomandy wrote:
Yeah, and that makes his bragging a positive thing!
Of course seen through my personal culturally influenced reality! But that shouldnt have to be said
Because every single social situation that ever have happened and will happen will be looked at differently depending on who is seeing and interpretate what is happening!!

theWarden wrote:You said yourself

Thomandy wrote:
Yeah, and that makes his bragging a positive thing!
Of course seen through my personal culturally influenced reality! But that shouldnt have to be said
Because every single social situation that ever have happened and will happen will be looked at differently depending on who is seeing and interpretate what is happening!!

WE don't all live in your reality. And thus, you should choose your words more carefully.

'Nuff said.


- W

What do you mean? Choose my words more carefully? What have I said that is wrong!
The ONLY thing I said was: To fully understand one have to be open to the fact that others might see things differently!

Do you disagree?

You are not willing to see my side of the situation and my meaning of in this case this word!
I, as I said can understand Why you see the word as a negative, again I cant understand why you are not open to see my side of the case!

I have to repeat myselfe:

"I can promise you, that if you only use your own culture to define the world you are nearly blind!"

Lolz dude, I bet you feel like a cool guy moving my post to ANDREW into this thread...?


And then giving me -1 points hahaha



Kids these days



There ya go!
Feel better

Lanxil wrote:
Seems to me like you solved to whole problem through philosophy, I appreciate that!
But the problem lies in human nature.Many of those, who brag are likely to be people who overdo it.
Of course It is a question of morality. A person with morals wouldn`t overdo it, but, because there are those people, who overdo it, we, or at least I, have an negative association with it.
Sure there are different cultures with different ways of behavour, but I think you can not deny the fact, that psychology, meaning certain ways of behaving, is something that does not change, wherever you are.
(of course this applies only to humans xD)
I mean most people would do everything (for example) for money, if the amount is high enough.
I know, that we could quarrel about that all night long, because it would lead us to many different questions in life... but well, let`s leave it at that if you are agreed ^^
(yeah I kinda like philosophy xD and I like discussions [if that is the right word for it ^^])

Yeah, I like that you are open to see things in different perspectives Thats a very good ability to have as a human being And also you are reflected enough to see that your negative association with the word is affecting your view on it And that is very important as well, so be able to identify the prejudges we have and to know how they affect us in life, instead of just ignoring them!

So then instead of just instantly judging someone of something ect one can sit back, reflect and then make a more refined decision! Like this Word Bragging - What I have been saying all along is that people see this word in different ways, and what is the correct way, well Im not sure there is a correct way of looking at it. But that not even important, finding who is right or wrong; The important thing is to know that others might see it differently^^ Then instead of arguing one can easily say; "Ah, I guess we didnt share the same view on this matter!" But thats okay! As long as both are open to see things from the other point of view in order to get along Its when One part dont want to do this the conflict emerges!

The term is: Cultural Relativism - To be able to see things with the eyes of the other side/culture/person ect
Not meaning that you Have to agree, but see things based on the other sides way of seeing!

If one cant do this, going at everything as if only You are correct, and your culture is the right foundation to interpretate things then I believe one are ignorant and walking through life with little sight! Most people inkl. myself dont see this and understand this unless they have been educated on the matter. I have been lucky enough to study the subject of Sociology, Psychology and Social-Anthropology It opens many doors in communication, especially to other cultures but also within cultures, cause even within a culture we got All these Personal perspectives that also varies, often not That much but still, enough to create conflicts

theWarden wrote:Lolz dude, I bet you feel like a cool guy moving my post to ANDREW into this thread...?
And then giving me -1 points hahaha

There ya go!
Feel better

I didnt do that, I only split the topics since we where going way of topic, discussing definitions and cultural views ect insted of him posting his video!! Didnt see that your post to him was in the middle there, but you can just copy it and ad it again in his post! Thats no problem!``

You dont have to be rude though, and I didnt give you -1!!

LOL I think we've seen enough of this.

NOTE: It's always good to share as long as you don't boast.

P.S:

Lolz dude, I bet you feel like a cool guy moving my post to ANDREW into this thread...?
And then giving me -1 points hahaha

There ya go!
Feel better Smile

And yeah lol you dont have to be rude just because you got a -1 xD
Oh and what you're doing about complaining about ur -1 is called really bad bragging xD

Cmo'n man, "I bet you feel like a cool guy" ??? you mad at the world or smthing? He's a moderator that power was given to him so its kinda normal. Dont tell me you're not mad/ angry because you added "Lolz and hahahaha" cause that just seriously pisses me off.

Word from the wise (me? ): Dont deny the obvious.

Hell, I once got up to -4. You just have to post a few more times and get thanked for them, and getting angry and blaming people randomly isn't a good way to start!

surehit123 wrote:LOL I think we've seen enough of this.

NOTE: It's always good to share as long as you don't boast.

P.S:

Lolz dude, I bet you feel like a cool guy moving my post to ANDREW into this thread...?
And then giving me -1 points hahaha

There ya go!
Feel better Smile

And yeah lol you dont have to be rude just because you got a -1 xD
Oh and what you're doing about complaining about ur -1 is called really bad bragging xD

Cmo'n man, "I bet you feel like a cool guy" ??? you mad at the world or smthing? He's a moderator that power was given to him so its kinda normal. Dont tell me you're not mad/ angry because you added "Lolz and hahahaha" cause that just seriously pisses me off.

Word from the wise (me? ): Dont deny the obvious.

Hell, I once got up to -4. You just have to post a few more times and get thanked for them, and getting angry and blaming people randomly isn't a good way to start!

Hmmm.
I don't think I was mad, I actually don't take the internet that serious.
Especially when I'm fairly new to a forum.
But after I read your post:



I did that.

/sarcasm

I just found it funny that as a moderator he sorta did the "moving thread" job without reading thru what he was moving. I'm not mad.

Promise, kiddo.

-W

Well gud luck finding a new monitor/keyboard

Thomandy wrote:
so be able to identify the prejudges we have and to know how they affect us in life, instead of just ignoring them!

The term is: Cultural Relativism - To be able to see things with the eyes of the other side/culture/person ect

You are right, prejudices are something we cannot deny, even though we are people who do not try to have prejudices, we still have them unconscious, at least to a certain degree. That is why we should attentive to be able to expose our own prejudges. I think the way to solve the problem is talking to each other to understand the others point of view. (if everyone would do that there might be a possibility that there would be no further wars, even though that is farfetched ,I know). So let`s see how it is in common. The problem we encounter now is, that there are people, who are extremly introverted, sometimes to such an extreme extent, that they really live in their "own world". You cannot change a person, at least not directly. a person have to want to change itself. So how to accomplish that? Through an indirect way. the keywords are talking and trust. I think it is an easy task for someone like you, but what is if we have, let`s say, two individuals, both of them extremly introverted. How to get those two to understand each other? I know it is possible, but that is gonna take some time. (let`s say Politicians for example xD)
Rationalism would be a way to go, but we cannot teach every single person this concept.
Liberalism might be another way... if everyone would accept that.
Anyway, Talking is the way to go like we are doing it. ^^